Monday, September 29, 2008

Token of love

He had left it in his wardrobe years back.The shine on the plastic wrapper had not faded.It stood out among the ruins of his cupboard.It lay there untouched,like a treasure chest,of bitter yet sweet memories.He neither knew what he had to do with it,nor was he willing to do away with it.

A strong critique,he was, of any kind of relationship with girls,thanks to the orthodox environment he was brought up in.Little did he realise,things were going to turn topsy turvy in a few years.

Things were going his way,when he secured admission to one of the premier institutions in town.He had heard innumerable stories on how people spoil their lives after joining colleges.The fear of the unknown haunted him, but he nourished high hopes of making it big in college.Classes commenced,and amidst all the nerve raking environment of those first few days in college, he was getting used to 'monotonicity' of college life.He found it hilarious to see guys scouting after girls and flirting.As time went by,he was getting used to it.He no longer found it hilarious,but had accepted it as part of college life.The thought of getting closer to any girl never crossed his mind.He despised it.

A few years back, while in school he had met a girl, on whom he had a secret crush. He was neither bold enough to talk to her, nor the thought about the society around him helped his cause. The crush was eventually crushed amidst the tensions of the public exams and entrance examinations. He had a dream and wanted no roadblocks while in pursuit of the dream. After securing admission to the college of his choice, he realised that the crush had lived the testimony of time. The girl was still living in his dreams. He had little or no plans on what needs to be done. It was a totally new avenue for him. Two years into college, he revealed his well kept secret to his close friend, and he expressed his disgust at not being able to do something about it. A few minutes of pep talk from his friend was all it took.He had decided to propose her. His decision defied his own logic, but was elated that he had finally decided to make a move in the right direction(hopefully).

The thought of proposing a girl gave him butterflies in his stomach. He had never talked to any girl personally, but little did he know from where he got the courage from. His friend managed to fix an 'appointment' with the girl using his contacts. The protoganist made some mental calculations, and he knew the most probable answer would be a 'NO'. The much anticipated day arrived. He and his friend arrived at the venue much before time. There was a huge twist awaiting him. He got a call from home asking him to come home for some very urgent work. He had no other go, had to leave almost immediately, entrusting the job of proposing, on his behalf, to his friend. After finishing off his work he called up his friend, who delievered the bad news to him...She had told a 'Big NO'. Not at all surprised, he consoled himself and decided not to nourish the thought anymore. A few weeks went by, he met her in 'Orkut' added her as a friend , and eventually started chatting with her. The chatting sessions evolved from orkut scraps to IM's in yahoo messenger. A friendship was blossoming. She was the same he had expected her to be. She wanted to know why he loved her so much, and loved talking to him. He was on cloud nine, felt as if his dreams were seeing the light of the day. The relationship was going stronger with each passing day. Months went by, they had progressed from IM's to late night SMS's to phone calls to occasional meetings. She was the most precious thing in his life, and he felt she too loved him a lot. Her sentences, and messages coerced him to believe so, though she never gave it away bluntly. He hadn't proposed her officially, but she knew his attitude towards her.Everything went smoothly over the next few months.

Somewhere along their conversation,he had mentioned about proposing her officially, and he realised she wanted some gift from his side.He had never got a gift for anybody all his life, and to a girlfriend, he never knew what to buy.Days of thought and surfing helped him in finding the perfect gift (within his minimal budget). He got the perfect gift for her. He called her up and asked her to decide on a time and place to meet. She sounded indifferent, he sensed something was wrong. She kept postponing the meeting, and he started realising that something was seriously wrong. The number of SMS's was coming down, she was avoiding him. Not knowing what was going around, he decided to ask her. After much compulsion she revealed the issue. It was an 'enlightenment', she realised she was doing the wrong thing by getting close to him, and hence she wanted him out of her life. Her words couldn't convince him logically. He was shell shocked, and she was forbidding him from staying in contact with her and he was blamed for using his 'words' to lure her. A mixed bag of emotions,depression, anger, confusion,never before he was in such a state. His mind was in a whirlpool. His emotional brain had taken charge of him. He begged, pleaded her, to stay in touch. After days of compulsion she agreed to a daily limit of three days, but he was missing her so much. Days of stress made him more emotionally stronger. He told his parents, what had happened. Their words of wisdom too added to the cause.He was growing strong emotionally. As days passed by, he took a firm resolve not to contact her anymore, and decided to end what he had started years back.
He realised what true love is.....The never ending support from parents, even when they know that their children have committed a mistake. There is no other relationship in this world that can surmount it.

The site of the gift no longer hurt him, but everytime it reminded him of the importance of loving his parents. A barrage of thoughts and a smile of glee ensued. Things have fallen apart; the chain of events during that BLIND period in his life triggered a smile. He had realized the triviality of his actions. Suddenly, the door bell rang; he closed the wardrobe, bringing an abrupt end to his thoughts. He moved out of the room. He was still smiling………………..

4 comments:

Anoop said...

AWESOME Man .. Gem of a work !!! :)

Anonymous said...

its a great feeling when you know that your buddy have treaded the same path which eeven you went through once.
I should say, the experience was worth it, for making young what you are, today.
A few things, I would like to scribble down here.
1. Its not always the pain, but the fear of pain which usually leads us to conclusions. Perhaps its the fear of losing her wich eventually, led to losing her

2. Of all the creatures of God, Women were created as a perfect enigma for men. Often we dream, only if they could be a little simpler. Well, God made them as nutty crackpots, what editing can we do!

3. You should write more often. Despite of the profile description, You have an awesome command over the pen. I AM LOOKING FORWARD to read more from you, buddy!

Ur Partner in crime

Hari said...

That was THE BEST crushed post I've EVER read! Made me go through a pang of deja vu! Our lives are SO similar!

Don't worry bro... Everything happens for your own good. See... You'll get a better girl soon!

And, didn't you write this, getting inspiration from my blog? :P

Btw, your language has become TOO GOOD now. Looks more like the b'lore effect. :-)

Vinay said...

Great writing... :)
You dunno me, but I once worked for the same ex-employer of yours (when I say ex, its 100%. Go figure!!!).