The Next Step

He woke up to the din outside his window. He could hear the horns blaring, and people shouting. Cursing the world around him, he checked his watch to realize that he was already late for work. Having completed his morning chores in a jiffy, he left for office. En route to office,the same thought was ringing in his head, but he knew, things were beyond his control. He got down from the bus, and strolled towards office, still lost in thought.He entered office to find a seemingly annoyed boss, who gave him a cold stare. He smiled at the boss, and walked towards his cubicle, and turned on his work station. He stared at the monitor, and was grappled by the thought that time was running out on him. He was visibly shaken, but was vehement that the project should not suffer at any cost. Grappling hard to keep the thoughts at bay, he resumed work.

His silence was perplexing, and all the more annoying. He had asked her to meet him in the evening at their favourite coffee shop. She wondered, whether a storm was brewing in the horizon. He was elusive, whenever she brought up the topic as they spoke. Left with no answers but her own world of thoughts, the more she thought, the more anxious she became, and a sense of doom prevailed on her. Was this the end of the road, she wondered?

The coffee on his desk had gone cold. He was lost amidst the barrage of thoughts. He was going through a transformation over the last six months. Every morning, on his way to work, he came across many children at traffic signals, railway stations etc begging alms. Having had a clear cut understanding of what organized begging was, he never paid any heed to such requests from numerous children. He felt sorry for their plight, and always left with a sense of helplessness. The city taught him about the huge disparity that existed between the rich and the poor. He realized that the rich was getting richer and the poor was getting poorer, despite the government rolling out welfare schemes in every budget. A systemic fault it seemed to him, but he never wanted to be one among the elite youth, who blames the system, without even understanding what the system really is. He was pained to see children eating alongside dogs, and crawling in a pile of garbage. What pained him more was, these kids would never have the opportunity to fight it out in this competitive world, and would eventually end up leading lowly lives, in shanties or dingy chawls. He knew, the time was ripe for him to take the leap. He had decided to quit his job,join an NGO and devote his time for the upliftment of these less fortunate children. His commitment to the cause outweighed his concern for the personal sacrifices he may have to undertake. Today, he embarked upon a mission to tell his lady love about his grand plan. He envisioned her as his future wife, and he knew, he would need her support in this endeavor. He had the herculean task of convincing her about his decision. She had hopes of getting settled, and starting a family. Her dreams would be in doldrums, if he pushed his decision on her. He wondered, whether this could be the end of the road? A personal sacrifice, nevertheless, for a greater cause.

It was 6pm, and he left office in a hurry. He rushed to the coffee shop, to find her with tension written all over her face. He smiled at her, and ordered the regular. He looked deep into her eyes, and clasped her palm. She gave him a quizzical look, and he started talking. He waxed rhapsodic on his decision to quit and work for the society. He apologized to her for keeping it under the wraps, as he wanted to be convinced beyond any doubt. She gave a patient ear, and he could feel the nervousness easing out in her. The smile had reappeared on her face, clasped his hand firmly, and she asked, " When are you joining ? "
The tension was off the air, and they burst into laughter !!! 

Before you Repost

It has been a season of uprisings. The Arab uprising, capture wall street, and we also had our share in India with the Lokpal drama. It is a pity that the world has entered into another economic crisis, thanks to Euro zone, this time. There is an upsurge in the number of disgruntled average Indian citizen, thanks to the rising fuel prices, rising food inflation and a falling Indian rupee. Industrialists are complaining about an indecisive Government, and Mamata Banerjee is complaining about a Government that overlooks her suggestions during the decision making process. Bottom line, no one is happy !!!

The Indian citizen has always been very irate against his Government, since time immemorial. The discussions that were confined once confined to tea shops and hotels, have now gone online. The intrusive growth of social media have been instrumental in fuelling the anger and rage among people. Internet hooliganism is on the rise, and people seem to vent their anger from across their computer screen. Well it is gratifying to know that the number of computer literates in the country is rising faster than our expected GDP. On the other hand, it is equally disturbing to know that social networking sites like facebook are no longer meant to catch up with friends. These sites have transmogrified into a potent weapon for spreading false propaganda. The success of "Kolaveri", an internet video making the headlines and ensuing discussions on the news channels shows the significance of internet as a means of communication (of course, media is desperate for something to report, at least 'Kolaveri' makes better reading than what Sunny Leone does at big boss !!!)

An upsurge in misinformation campaigns being carried out via social media, is indeed alarming. People post and repost articles showing list of swiss bank account holders, documentary evidence against the Gandhi family (supposedly from Subramanian Swamy), and the list can go on and on. I am baffled at times by the such irresponsible action of some of my friends, whom I deem are people with a minimal common sense. A point in contention here is,if you have so much documentary evidence against anyone, you can go to any court in this country and file a law suit. The odds of you chancing up on an anti-congress judge is very high in this country, considering multi polar political scenario in the country. If some guy in FB is having a list with the swiss bank account holder details, he can walk directly to all media offices, and hand it over. Odds are someone would publish the news, after verifying the authenticity of the same. After all, they are desperate for some sensational news. Well, there in lies the crux of the problem. Anyone can publish any false information in facebook, and if the topic is emotive, and politically biased, often it ends up going viral.

I should add a few lines here on Lokpal drama too. I appreciate the way, social media was used tactfully to organize such a successful campaign. I stand against corruption, and the introduction of Lokpal bill. However, during Anna's fast during the latter half of this year, I was amused to see people supporting the Jan Lokpal bill, without knowing, what the bill is all about. I wonder, "Why do I believe in God, when I don't know, whether he exists or not?". However, me believing in God does not bring political unrest to the country.

The next time, before you repost anything on facebook or  forward a mail making tall claims, do visit http://www.hoax-slayer.com/. At least you would know, the veracity of whatever you are posting. When it comes to political issues or issues regarding Governance, you can Government websites, or google for the authentic version of any Policy document or bills tabled in Parliament. It would be for the greater good, if you are aware of what you are supporting for !!!
 

Quarter Life Crisis !!!

I turned 25 on June 9,2011.I was woken up by my parents, who wished me "happy birthday", and dragged me out of bed. I started off my day with a visit to the temples, and returned home to find a big party being arranged by my aunt at her place. The presence of my parents, bro, cousin, sis-in-law, grandma, and other relatives made it a very special affair for me. It was a memorable day, and I had my aunt to thank for, for making it a special day in my life. Unlike last year, I had decided to spend my birthday with my parents and relatives. I planned my holidays accordingly. Birthday's have always been a very silent affair for me. My friends broke the trend last year, throwing me a surprise party. Perhaps the sweetest memory I had in my two years of IIT life.

However, birthday wishes from unexpected quarters brightened my day further. Sreetama, was the first to call me at 12 am, followed by Ashish. I knew more were to come. However, no one called until morning, and I was again surprised to see an SMS from Pradeep. I received another call from Sharmada, and I knew more were supposed to come. There was no word from my five dearest friends..Gaudhaman, Abhijith,Sourav, Sindhu and Krishnakali..I was a little disturbed, and I dropped an SMS to all five with the following content:

"This is ur last and final chance to wish me on my 25th bday. Hurry !!! offer valid till 11.59pm today"

Abhijith called me immediately,wished me and chided me for not posting my bday on FB, followed by Sindhu, who was really sorry for missing the date. Krishnakali called me a little later with a rhetorical tone asking me "Why, no one wished you or what ?". I was a little shaken, and by the time I thought of an answer, she had wished me, and I hung up thanking her for calling. She followed it up with an SMS that left me awestruck. Gaudhaman was down with severe food poisoning and he was on sedatives. He rang me, and blamed it on the sedatives for having put in sleep for almost 12 hrs. However, the sad part was, Sourav, could not call me, as he was super busy with his marriage preparations.

Now, an obvious question would prop up in the readers mind, why am I writing about this at 4am in the morning after more than a month? Today, my friends Sreetama, Abhijith, Gaudhaman and krishnakali outsmarted me, and gifted me a Shirt. I had expressed my disapproval to the trio Sreetama, Abhijith, and Gaudhaman against any such celebrations, but they went ahead,bought the gift and tricked me into going to MoD with them. It was a pleasant surprise (or was it?) and it left me thinking how much they care for me. I am sure a huge void would be created in my life when Gaudhaman leaves IIT for Germany. He was a younger brother to me, one whom I used to scold, advise, and listen to. I guess he was privileged to get the odd slap from me once !!! There is also some talk about Abhijith and Sreetama too leaving IIT. Abhijith, is more like a mentor to me. He advised me on the nuances of maintaining personal relations, when all I bothered about was maintaining Professional relations. Sreetama,is a confidante, who chides me, if I am wrong and supports me all along, if I am right about something. These are gaping holes which cannot be easily filled. The very fact, that I would miss all three of them in the nearby future is making me jittery.

Many of my friends had asked me recently why I had suddenly become serious. I can only tell you that I am preparing for the impending transition that is going to happen in my life. I am the one who will face it, and hence, I need to be better equipped. I need to learn to live without a little brother around, I need to live without a mentor, and I should do away with a confidante. I have reasons to worry about, and at times it just translates into my basic nature. Well, I apologize to those friends who found it little irksome. Well I guess, this is what they call quarter life crisis !!!

Love Letter to Data

Dear Data,

Not a single day goes by, where I do not stare into the abyss, waiting to see you. You walked in and out of my life like a storm, and I have been waiting for you ever since. My life would be incomplete without you, and you have become an integral part of my life.

The sheer possibility of seeing you makes my day. Once or twice you came so close by, but you were oblivious to my existence. Everyday I embark on a frantic search, a search which will last until I find you. You have always been an enigma, and I wish I could decipher the enigma. You are the driving force of my life, and the sheer thought of you enthralls me.

The audacity with which you walk in, without any premonition startles me, but I bask in your exuberance. We are made for each other. Together we can be a force to reckon with, scaling heights, and be happy in each others presence.

I invite you, my dear data, into my life. Hope you would respond to this letter.


With tons of love,

Sandeep S S

Close to heart

Another semester is drawing to a close. Last couple of weeks have been fabulous. I was getting back to serious work, India was winning matches, I had started playing tennis, football with my hostel mates; everything was looking up. I am happy in my little world, the people around me making my day on most occassions. A tad disappointment still lingers deep down though. From being an introvert, my transition has been quite dramatic. From someone who minced his words, I have become someone who enjoys talking to people (to put it in relativistic terms, I blabber a lot these days !!!). My friends were always there for me offering support and lend me an ear, when I was going through a rough path. I really thank Sreetama, and Gaudhaman, for lending a patient ear and offering me advice whenever I needed them.

A sincere apology to Rohit for throwing my attitude at him. I really did not mean to hurt you, it was a little miscommunication. The last couple of months, I was really irritable and was not managing my temper very well. I was losing my temper so often, unlike before. I had always kept my temper under wraps for almost 8yrs now, and over the last few months I was losing it quite often. My mind was cluttered, I was lost in sea of thoughts, and I was really missing my dear ones. I was losing focus, and was in a deep slumber. I had almost never lost my temper on my friends, and here I was, losing it on a few. I pondered for a few days, as to what was happening with me.

An internal turmoil was going on. My logical reasoning had taken a back seat, and I was being driven by emotion. My notions about right and wrong were being questioned, and above all, my basic character was put under the hammer. My sanity was questioned at times. I started wondering, whether i was doing things wrong, despite my conviction telling me otherwise. Things no longer looked simple. It dawned on me that I was carrying a huge baggage with me. I was never put under the scanner like this ever before. I was going through too much indecisiveness. There was lack of clarity, and vision, and I could see no light at the end of the tunnel. I was stressed, stressed like hell !!!

It was some concerted effort from my friends, Sreetama, Gaudhaman, and dude "Prajith" who helped me come out of the 'soup', I was taking myself into. Friends they are, and am sure they will always be there for me. Thank you guys, for helping me out. I owe you big time :)

The much needed boost

I had this grand plan of making at least one entry per month in this blog. However, I was not able to live up to my own expectations. I was busy could be the easiest answer I can offer to convince myself. The fact remains something else. I had my semester break in december, and hence was absolutely jobless. I spent the one month break, traveling for almost two weeks with friends and family, and rest of the time in campus was spent on mindless movie watching and chatting over omegle.com. For people who are guessing what omegle.com is, it is a stranger chat website.

Classes resumed in January, and initial two weeks was fun. Less work, less course load etc, and I had ample time to write. However, I could not. I was not falling into the groove. However as days progressed, things started getting hectic, and I was no longer in the frame of mind to write a blog post.

I have my next mid semester exams starting in three days. Today, I was motivated by my friend and colleague Karthick Murukesan, who was appreciating my style of writing, and was inquiring why am I not writing anymore. His compliment was a much needed boost for me. I am going through a bad patch, and his words had the much needed positive vibes associated with it. My heartfelt thanks to Karthick for telling me those words. It was a much needed boost to my confidence, which was dipping with each passing day.

Looking forward to writing more often. Thanks for reading the post. Cya Soon.